Today’s Small Memories

I drove to work always feeling anxious. Even after being a vet (only a GP consulting vet nowadays though) for so long; I still feel pangs of anxiety in the morning as I drive in as vets are generally perfectionists and do pressurise themselves to be the best they can be (well I do anyway!). It is June and all the roadside poppies are out – they calmed my anxiety by their sheer beauty on my drive in to work.

I had two very memorable euthanasias today. I always feel honoured to be present at the final moments of an owner’s most intimate time – the time they have made the decision to put their most beloved pets to sleep and out of any further pain or discomfort.

Poppy was a darling 13 year old Lab who was carried in on her own bed as she could no longer stand, and she came in with her large soft pink toy in her mouth. We spent our time on the floor together discussing her life as I fed her cat treats. She was so blissfully oblivious to what lay ahead and I always commend an owner for making the final selfless decision to bring them in – possibly one of the hardest decisions we have to make in our lives.

Max was a 16 year old Westie – what an amazing age. His equally distraught owners were able to hold him in their arms but the decision was made slightly easier for them as he had suffered a small stroke and was completely unaware of anything being done to him.

I felt so stupid and what a silly thing I did!

Max had the small catheter in his backleg and I had brought the euthatal drawn up in a syringe with the needle cap on stored in my pocket so that I could hand Max back to the owners with free hands. When they were ready, I took the syringe from my pocket, and while squeezed next to the owner on a small chair, without thinking; I put the needle cap in my mouth and began injecting the contents of the syringe into Max’s very friable veins. As I tasted the terribly bitter contents of the needle cap on my tongue, I realised immediately what I had done but I could not stop the procedure and I tried hard not to swallow or talk.  A lesson learnt for me and thankfully no side effects! (just lots to eat on my drive home to take away the terrible taste!)

Breakfast after 2km plogging run –

  • Cup of Tic Toc redbush tea with soya milk
  • 2 Jus rol petit pains au chocolat with bowl of oat milk and dark chocolate melted
  • 1 hrt tablet
  • 2 Algae Omega 3 capsules

Lunch at work chatting with nurses, vets and receptionists:

  • Salad of couscous, lettuce, cherry tomatoes, sesame seeds, olive oil and malt vinegar
  • Blueberries
  • 1 apple
  • 1 banana
  • Quinoa snack bar from Aldi
  • Few grapes

Drive home (to keep me awake and get terrible bitter taste of euthatal from my mouth):

  • Almonds and raisins
  • 1 more Quinoa snack bar from Aldi

Once home:

  • Cup redbush caramel tea with oatmilk
  • 2 Jacob crackers


  • Bolognaise made with veggie mince, cherry tomatoes, Lloyd Grossman tomato and chili sauce, garlic, onions, sweet red pepper, vegetable stock and malt vinegar
  • Spinach pasta and broccoli
  • 1 satsuma
  • 1 Alpro blueberry yoghurt
  • 1 block Aldi 85% dark chocolate
  • Cup mint tea and so enjoy BGT finals and watching dear elderly Colin Thackeray win!
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